Calves Is Back With Coffee! Happy Easter!

Ha! I’m back! 

After a few weeks of detours and life events, I’m back!

I couldn’t think of a better time to post again but Easter – Happy Easter! The recent weeks felt like a journey of reinvention, and self-discovery for me. I hope that wherever you are in the world, you’re safe and hopefully, things around your area are getting better. The vaccines are already here! Let’s trust that we’ll all eventually see a better normal coming around the corner.

Random fun fact my nickname is “Kalvs.” All the pun intended in the post title.


One of the things I miss that we still couldn’t do freely in our side of the world is drinking coffee with my friends. I miss face-to-face conversations with them and having unlimited laughter while drinking my White Mocha Americano. Drinking the same drink alone in my place just doesn’t bring the same joy. Though a sip stirs up memories of people I look forward to seeing again.

Dear friend, if we were having coffee right now these are the things I’m excited to tell you.

My Amazing Calves

One of the things I learned from Coach Joel is that leg workouts are the most skipped workout routines. Hence, the epidemic of chicken legs most seen in men. I somehow get it, but I think it’s not that bad. Doing the squats, leg presses, hamstring curls, etc. makes me sweat a lot so doing them is a win for weight loss.

One time, as I was doing calf raises, Aldren pointed out that my calf muscles are getting more defined. He took a video and showed it to me. I was amazed! I never knew my calves looked like that! They looked like an inverted heart shape. They looked so cool that every now and then I look at them in the mirror. Hard work really pays off!

First Fresh Pasta

When I ordered baking supplies, the grocer put in a free 1-kilo bag of strong wheat flour for free. I was so happy but that quickly changed when I saw that it’s about to expire in 5 days. My dad used some of it for bread. I took it as an opportunity to make my first ever fresh pasta!

The recipe was easy. You only need flour, eggs, oil, and salt. You just need to mix them together, knead, and let rest for 30 minutes to relax the gluten for rolling. I don’t have a pasta rolling machine so I rolled it out by hand as thin as I possibly can and cut them into strips. Cook them for 1-2 minutes (or a little more) depending on how thick you rolled them.

Fresh pasta is definitely better than store-bought pasta. Would make it again for special occasions.

Expanded My Perfume Collection

I don’t know when it started but I’ve always been intrigued by perfumes. My dad used to own a collection too which he eventually gave away. As a kid I found his old stash lying around and sniffed them one by one. It was such an exhilarating olfactory experience!

The first-ever bottle I purchased was Bvlgari Extreme Pour Homme. That one sadly fell and the precious glass bottle broke. Since then, I have added fragrances to my collection. As of now, I have 17 scents that I spray in rotation at home since we are not allowed to go out yet. They’re all really beautiful scents!

I love how fragrances evoke memory and emotion. I wear them not only to smell good but also to feel good.

Bought A New Phone

Last year, I’ve been considering buying a new phone but everyday essentials were a top priority. Although a little slow, my phone wasn’t really broken so there’s no reason to buy a new one. 

Fast forward to this year, I went ahead and bought a new one since I found a good deal and it’s within budget. I got myself a Samsung S21+ that came with a free tablet and a travel adaptor. It feels nice to have a new gadget to play with. It can even run Genshin Impact a mobile game I’ve been itching to try since my last phone can’t handle it. More importantly, I love the quality of pictures and video it takes. It allows me to record for projects.

Joined An Acting Class

This is the most daring thing I’ve done in the first quarter of 2021. I’ve always wanted to participate in an acting workshop before the pandemic so this was a dream come true. When my friend told me there’s an opening for a workshop, I signed up without hesitation. I almost didn’t get in since the slots for the schedule I wanted was full but thankfully, one opened up a few weeks before classes began.

I came in class knowing only a few terms in acting and a mind buzzing with songs from musical theater. For five days we had a somewhat crash course on acting a taught different techniques. We had homework using TikTok duets and a final monologue piece that we write on our own. Acting really is a great artistic craft, you get to learn so much about yourself and about others. For me, it’s about making your character as authentic and truthful as possible so it becomes alive.

Acting, for me, is about letting truth live so that many will see it, feel it, and experience it.


To be honest with you guys, I had to push myself to write again. It was hard to get myself back writing after exploring all the detours life has offered me. I had this weird nagging need to write again at the back of my head. It gently prods me as if I had a debt of stories to tell the world. And I think it’s right. 

So I come out of my hiding this Easter and connect with the world again through my writing in whatever form it may take, hoping to reach at least one person. I had a good rest and adventurous detours and as I continue to write posts, I hope to share these stories with you.

If we’re having coffee right now, I think one cup won’t be enough. 

How’s your Easter? I want to read your stories too!


Fitness Friday 12: Make Time For What’s Important

This week has been a very busy one for me at work. I had several important meetings and urgent deliverables that I needed to attend to almost everyday. I had to do a video and voice recording for our community’s virtual music video. Also, I’m catching up on writing articles for my contributions to an evangelical social media account – Unmasked. It’s quite a long check list and a little bit overwhelming but these are things that I have wholeheartedly accepted. I’m thankful that I have things on my plate than none because I know that whatever I’m working on gives value to people and that in turn gives me fulfillment.

Despite the busyness I found that I just couldn’t drop the drive and idea of going to the gym. It has somehow been ingrained in my system to keep on going regardless of what I feel. Taking time and effort to stick to my goals is already pre-programmed in me for the week ahead. I have no reasons to stop especially when I’ve already come so far. I’m making time for gym because hitting my personal health goals is of high importance.

I’ve been shifting my gym schedule around this week and thankfully I found perfect slots that fit! So here is how my fitness journey went this amazing week.

Monday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Back & Core

Back:
12 Assisted Pull-ups (3 sets)
12 Deadlifts (3 sets)
12 Bent-Over Plate Row (3 sets) *new
12 Close-Grip Lat Pull-Down (3 sets)
12 Seated Row (4 sets)
12 Dumbbell Row (3 sets)
12 T Bar Row (3 sets)
12 Behind-the-Neck Lat Pulldown (3 sets)
12 Straight-Arm Lat Pulldown (3 sets) *new

Core (4 sets of):
20 Crunches
20 Bent Knee Crunches
20 Pike Crunches
20 Heel Touches

2 min. Plank (finisher)

Notes:

  • I think it’s good to start my week with back day. My posture just zips right up after the gym session
  • Coach adjusted the weight on my deadlift so I can have better control of the bar when lifting and do more reps for the last set.
  • Instead of doing the bent-over row with a barbell we switched to plates. I find doing it with plates a little easier than with the barbells. The trick is to control raising the plates so you target the right muscles.
  • Yes, I still don’t like doing that T-bar.
  • Doing the straight-arm lat pulldown was educational. At first it looked easy because you have to explosively pull the bar down towards your thighs and then add resistance to the bar as it raises. That resistance on the release is what you call “negative training”. Instead of putting pressure on muscles during the “contraction movement”, you put control and resistance on the “release movement.” This, according to research generates more tears in the muscle resulting to better gains.
  • The core routine after lifting weight was intense as it targets the upper, lower, and middle abdominal muscles as well as the obliques.
  • I’m not quite sure but I think I went over my calorie intake today. I feel a little hungrier than usual. I didn’t restrain myself much and even enjoyed two slices of bread with peanut butter.

Tuesday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Chest, Shoulders and Triceps

Chest:
12 Incline Barbell Press (3 sets)
12 Lying Bench Press (3 sets)
12 Decline Dumbbell Press (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Pullover (3 sets)
12 Pec Deck (3 sets)

Shoulders:
12 Dumbbell Shoulder Press (3 sets)
12 Lateral Raise (3 sets)
12 Plate Raise (3 sets)
12 Face Pull (3 sets)
12 Reverse Pec Deck (3 sets)

Triceps:
12 Triceps Pushdown
12 Reverse-Grip Triceps Pushdown
12 Dumbbell Overhead Triceps Extension (3 sets)

Cardio:
15 min. Bike

Notes:

  • Forgot to bring my Garmin this day
  • Doing the sets for chest is a little bit easier now compared to last week. Keeping negative training in mind, I tried to apply in all my sets. It does make a ton of difference.
  • While I was stretching out my chest doing a T pose, my coach noticed my arm flabs. He added a 3 triceps routine after my shoulder to get them more toned. I will still be working on them on Friday.
  • What I noticed about my body while I was doing shoulders was that my arms are not of the same length! my left arm is slightly longer than my right. This triggered an aha moment for me because it may be the cause of my wrist pain. I’ve been trying to keep them even when lifting although they are not. I need to adjust my posture to compensate this somehow.
  • Negative training while doing the shoulders was challenging but you can really feel the tension in the targeted muscles.
  • By the time we got to the triceps, I was amazed that I still have energy left to do the sets.
  • Coach ended my session with a 15 min bike since we also included triceps.

Thursday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Cardio (4 sets of):

15 Agility Ladder
15 Cones Drill
30 Prisoner’s Squats
30 Criss-cross Climbers
15 Burpees

Target Areas: Weak Point Training (Back)

12 Bent-over Plate Row (4 sets)
12 Seated Row (4 sets)
12 Dumbbell Row (4 sets)
12 Behind-The-Neck Rope Cable Row (3 sets)
12 Cable Row (4 sets)

Notes:

Cones drill and agility ladder
  • It was such an intense cardio session. I was partnered up with someone to do it with and both of us were swamped!
  • I had an amazing feeling of accomplishment after finishing the four sets of the grueling cardio routine.
  • We focused on targeting the back for our weak point training. It’s good to workout your back for better support and posture.
  • Applying the negative training is something to get used to especially that I am now more aware of it and its effects. It helps to know about what you’re doing so you can appreciate it while you’re doing it even if it’s hard
  • My diet is somehow all mixed up this week since my sister sent us a package with groceries and treats. I had to recalculate my caloric intake so I won’t over eat.

Friday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Legs & Arms

Legs:
12 Weighted Hip Thrust (3 sets)
12 Dead Squats (3 sets)
12 Leg Press (3 sets)
12 Romanian Deadlift (3 sets)
12 Leg Extension (3 sets)
12 Calf Raise (3 sets)

Biceps:
12 Hammer Curl (4 sets)
12 Cable Bar Curl (4 sets)

Triceps:
12 Triceps Pushdown (3 sets)
12 Triceps Cable Extension (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Overhead Triceps Extension (3 sets)
12 Single Leg Triceps Dip (3 sets)

Notes:

  • It still amazes me how much strength I’ve gained in four months. I’m lifting heavier weights now which I couldn’t even budge before.
  • I learned something new about doing the hip thrusts properly. I need to position myself correctly and be mindful of how I position my back and hips during the movement. This would be my third time doing it, I know I’ll eventually get the hang of it.
  • For the biceps we only did 4 sets of two routines. And trust me, they were extra challenging!
  • We’re focusing on making my flabby arms less flabby haha! So the triceps routines are really in it this week.
  • I’ve somehow gotten my caloric intake under control but things could be better in terms of the quality food I eat. We have a happy problem with our pantry I just need to be smarter in terms of eating.

Nutrition

As I have mentioned, my sister sent us a huge package of groceries and treats from the states. I have exercised a considerable amount of self restraint to monitor what I have been putting inside my body. My folks really enjoy eating the treats so I’ll just make eating the treats a few pieces at a time as a reward for a job well done. My sister also sent some healthy treats that I can use in my baking so I’m excited for that.

Yes, eat smart and not starve, or deprive yourself, else you’ll just binge.

I also did a meal prep this week which greatly helped me in my eating decisions. I know how many calories I’ve already eaten and adjust accordingly.


We have many things to do every day and all of us have different things that we attribute as “important.” Your “important” can be any of these things: taking care of your family, building a business, reading books, practicing an instrument, spending time with your friends, etc. Don’t let what’s important to you become lost opportunity because you didn’t make enough time for them.

If you really want something of great importance to grow and stay, you have to make enough time for them. Time doesn’t come cheap, wisely spend it on things of great value.

How did you spend your time today?

Making time for you,
-Kalvin


Fitness Friday 11: Stay Committed

This week, my mindset was to keep myself committed to my health goals. What helps keep me in line is giving myself positive affirmation when I see myself in the mirror, and establishing routines that makes it easier for me to go for the healthier choice. One of the routines was to prepare my meals for the whole week so I wouldn’t bother ordering anything else and indulge in my cravings too much. I would just get what I prepared in the fridge, heat it in the microwave and eat not worrying too much about how many calories I’ve already consumed.

I think when we want to change something, we must understand that the process for that change to happen is where we should focus our energy on. It’s the process in the middle that makes the change happen. We need to be consistent and committed to it until we finally reach our desired goals. If the process isn’t working, adjust it to make it work well for you and not the other way around.

Submit to your process, keep at it until you reach your goal.

Monday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Back & Cardio/Core

Back:
12 Assisted Pull-ups (3 sets)
12 Deadlifts (3 sets)
12 Bent-Over Barbell Row (3 sets)
12 Seated Row (3 sets)
12 Wide-Grip Lat Pull-Down (3 sets)
12 Behind-the-Neck Lat Pull-Down (3 sets)
12 T Bar Row (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Row (3 sets)

Cardio & Core:
5 min. Sprint
2 min. Plank

Notes:

  • I forgot to charge my fitness tracker so I wasn’t able to record my active calories.
  • We upped the weights again this week.
  • I find it difficult to engage the right back muscles when doing the movements. I believe I’ll nail them down after a while.
  • I still don’t like the T Bar Row! haha! Engaging those back muscles in the right posture really takes a lot out of me.

Tuesday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Chest & Shoulders

Chest:
12 Lying Bench Press (3 sets) *last set 10 reps
12 Incline Barbell Press (3 sets)
12 Decline Dumbbell Bench Press (3 sets) *last set 10 reps
12 Dumbbell Pullover (3 sets)
12 Pec Deck (3 sets)
12 Cable Crossover (3 sets)

Shoulders:
12 Dumbbell Shoulder Press (3 sets)
12 Lateral Raise (3 sets)
12 Plate Raise (3 sets)
12 Bent-Over Rear Deltoids(3 sets) *new
12 Face Pull (3 sets)
12 Upright Row (3 sets)

Cardio (3 sets of):
30 Battle Rope Jacks
30 Climbers
15 Burpees
30 Leg Raise
30 Ankle Touches

Notes:

  • My left wrist hurts a bit but the supports are doing a good job.
  • I still find doing the shoulders challenging but I can feel the improvement when I touch them.
  • Doing the Bent-Over Rear Deltoids in the proper form took me a little getting used to. It hits those shoulder muscles differently from what I’m used to.
  • The cardio session at the end was killer! I’m happy though that I can now do 10 burpees and 30 leg raises straight.

Thursday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Cardio (4 sets of):

30 Sprint
15 Burpees
30 Battle Rope
15 Slam Ball
15 Plyo Box

Target Areas: Weak Point Training

Lower Back
12 Behind-the-Neck Lat Pull-Down (4 sets)

Middle Back
12 Middle Back Row (4 sets)

Lower Abs
20 Advance Leg Raise (4 sets)

Saddle Bags
20 Plate Bends(4 sets)

Notes:

  • The cardio this day was so intense! It took me an hour to finish all four sets.
  • I can now jump higher on the plyo box which means my body is also getting lighter.
  • I’m happy that I was able to finish all the routines.
  • I hope my skin would still have elasticity to go back especially on my stomach area. I guess having loose skin once I finally reach my goals would be a happy problem.
  • It always helps that my coach would drop encouraging words every now and then during my workout. Much needed affirmation goes a long way.

Friday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Legs & Arms

Legs:
12 Weighted Hip Thrust (3 sets)
12 Dead Squats (3 sets)
12 Lying Hamstring Curl (3 sets)
12 Lunges (3 sets)
12 Calf Raise (3 sets)
12 Leg Extension (3 sets)

Biceps:
12 Seated Dumbbell Curl (3 sets)
12 Seated Preacher Curl (3 sets)
12 Hammer Curl (3 sets)
12 Wrist Curl (3 sets)

Triceps:
12 Triceps Press Down (3 sets)
12 Triceps Cable Extension (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Overhead Triceps Extension (3 sets)

Core (3 sets of):
30 Mat Ab Crunches
30 Leg Raises
30 Figure of 4 Crunches (per side)

2 min Plank (Finisher)

Hip thrust. My form needs improvement

Notes:

  • Doing legs is so tiring. It engages many muscles.
  • I’m still getting used to doing the hip thrusts. Good thing I’m alternating doing them with another person so I can see how it’s to be executed.
  • There was a kind lady in her senior years who’s still going to gym making her body fit. She is a huge inspiration because at her age she strives to keep herself healthy and strong. She even got me beat in the muscle territory! Amazing!
  • One of my fellow gym-goers celebrated their birthday today as well and bought some food in. I wouldn’t refuse such a great offer! I had a slice of pizza, a cup of spaghetti, and a piece of roast chicken after finishing the sets for my core.

Nutrition

I did do my meal prep for the week. Each prepared meal amounts to more or less 500 calories. I try to hit at most 1800 calories per day. The remaining calories I use for snacking on some healthy or unhealthy cravings. The difference from last week with regard to my nutrition is that whenever I eat a snack, I would look at the nutrition facts at the back and check the serving size guide so I can adjust the amount I consume.

On the left is what I would have for dinner, some zucchini and pork belly. What you see in the middle is the treat I rewarded myself with midweek, an ice scramble with all the naughty toppings, that cup replaced my dinner. On the right is my meal prep of baked chicken breast with bacon, hard boiled eggs, stir fried ground beef, and some stir fried veggies.


Two consecutive weeks of eating prepared chicken breasts and hard boiled eggs is getting boring but it helps me stay committed. Always try to find something new you can incorporate in your routine to mix things up and keep your drive going especially if you’re just forming a new habit. Make the process work for you and not against you.

Oh and please, do you have any recommended low carb recipes you want me to try?

Until next time,
Kalvin

Photo by Gordon Cowie on Unsplash


Fitness Friday 09: Three Months – I Can See The Gains!

The weather is getting colder than usual here in the Philippines. Cold weather equals bed weather, and sleeping in a bit is the most enjoyable thing to do. Because of this, I did all my workouts with Coach Joel in the afternoon. My body was up for it but I still prefer the quiet energy of the gym in the morning when there’s less people.

Now on my third month, I now can see many improvements on my body when I look in the mirror. I can now feel muscles in parts of my body where there used to be fat, especially around my arms and thighs. My stomach is still protruding but it’s way, way flatter now than when I started. All of my muscles are still covered by a layer of fat but they have more definition now.

My weight is still at around 94kg. It’s still the same from last year but it’s because I’m gaining muscle mass. The thing about losing weight is that we should not be super obsessive about the number on the scale. That number does not fully define your progress. Your weight can go up and down in your weight loss journey depending on your diet and how your body responds to a healthier lifestyle. Keep yourself on track and just continue with patience and you’ll eventually reach your goals.

Guys! Starting next week I’ll start sharing what I’ve been eating – all the good and not so good. I think it’s interesting to share my relationship with food as well as I continue on this journey. I don’t have a perfect diet plan but maybe sharing them will help me become more conscious and go for better choices.

Monday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Back & Cardio/Core

Back:
12 Assisted Pull-ups (3 sets) *new routine
12 Deadlifts (3 sets)
12 Seated Reverse Pec Deck (3 sets)
12 Reverse-Grip Lat Pull-Down (3 sets)
12 Behind-the-Neck Lat Pull-Down (3 sets)
12 Seated Row (3 sets)
12 T Bar Row (3 sets)
12 Barbell Row (3 sets)

Cardio (3 sets of):
1 min. Battle Rope Jacks
20 Slam Ball
30 Plate Side Bends

Notes:

  • It was my first time doing the assisted pull-ups. Assisted because one foot is resting on a barbell set a few feet above the ground so I wouldn’t carry my whole weight when doing the pull-ups. It was interesting to do since I’m basically pulling my own weight up.
  • Doing all the back routines really helped me with my posture. I’m amazed that the way I walked and sat straightened up even after this session.
  • The cardio at the end was tiring! It was my first time doing 1 min. battle rope jacks and I can barely do it non-stop by the last set. I had to rest a few seconds during the whole 1 minute.
  • I went home feeling accomplished with good posture.

Wednesday

DO NOT QUIT! This mural just makes you unleash more strength!

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Chest & Shoulders

Chest:
12 Incline Barbell Press (3 sets)
12 Decline Dumbbell Bench Press (3 sets)
12 Lying Bench Press (3 sets)
12 Pec Deck (3 sets)
12 Cable Crossover (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Pullover (3 sets)

Shoulders:
12 Dumbbell Shoulder Press (3 sets)
12 Lateral Raise (3 sets)
12 Plate Raise (3 sets)
12 Reverse Pec Deck (3 sets)
12 Upright Row (3 sets)
12 Shrugs (3 sets)

Cardio (3 sets of):
30 Jumping Jacks
30 High Knees
30 Single Battle Rope
30 Double Battle Rope

Core:
100 Leg Raises
100 Ab Crunches

Notes:

  • I forgot to bring my fitness tracker so I wasn’t able to track my gym activities.
  • Coach added a made me do a few more routines than usual. Upping the game.
  • I’m happy with the way my chest looks. It’s giving my body a sense of proportion.
  • Coach commented that my shoulders are taking shape. I noticed this too! They’re more angular now than rounded.
  • The shrugs look like they’re an easy routine. Technically, it is but you have to control it so it targets the right spot while holding heavy weights.
  • I thought cardio was going to be easy but they made me spend my remaining energy for that day.

Friday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Legs & Arms

Legs:
12 Dead Squats (3 sets) 90 kilos
12 Leg Press (3 sets)
12 Romanian Deadlift (3 sets)
12 Leg Extension (3 sets)
12 Calf Raises (3 sets)
Weighted Lunges *new

Biceps:
12 Seated Preacher Curl (3 sets)
12 Standing Dumbbell Curl (3 sets)
12 Hammer Cable Curl (3 sets)
12 Concentration Curl (3 sets)

Triceps:
12 Triceps Bar Pushdown (3 sets)
12 Cable V Pushdown (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Overhead Triceps Extension (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Kickbacks (3 sets)

Cardio (3 sets of):
1 min. Battle Rope
15 Ab Roller

Notes:

  • Coach added a few more routines for me to do and I’m game!
  • I’m lifting 90 kilos for squats but this time I did all three sets with minimal help from a spotter. Usually, when I squat someone will put their arms around me from behind and clasp their hands around my stomach for added support in lifting the weight. This time around, I was encouraged by light taps on my elbow as I can control the bar better now. I’m proud of this development in strength and coordination.
  • Coach commented that my biceps are getting firm. They’re were like jelly before. Same with my triceps.
  • Doing the 1 minute battle rope was tough! It takes a LOT from you but coach says when they train for a race they do it for three minutes straight. Sore. Sore. Sore.
  • It was my first time doing the ab roller and it took me a while to get used to it. I didn’t know how to position my body without tipping over so Aldren lightly stepped on my feet to help me finish doing the sets. I even fell down on my stomach once! HAHA!

In the three months of going to gym, I’ve seen people of all shapes and sizes willingly submitting themselves to hard work so they can improve their physique. I’m thankful to have supportive people at the gym who has the same goal of becoming healthy versions of themselves.

I think I get it now, why some people are gym addicts – being healthy is addictive!

You walk, talk, and breathe differently when you’re healthy. When we are healthy, we can benefit from our body’s design to the fullest. Health really is wealth.

We are only blessed with one body. Love it, and take care of it.

Until next week!


20 Firsts of 2020 : A Birthday Special – You’re Invited!

Today is December 31, 2020 and it’s MY BIRTHDAAAAAYY!
HOORAY! *confetti* *fireworks*

Before anything else, I’d like to thank everyone who clicked the tiny follow button on my humble blog. I’ve only ever dreamed of getting a hundred follows by the year ends but I can’t believe that there are now more than 200 of you guys! Thank you so so much! You guys made my birthday extra special!

The one thing that people always assume when they hear that my birthday is on the 31st of December is that I get to have a grand celebration. Well, yes and no, Yeah, I mean it’s grand in a sense that my neighbors, and more or less the whole world, prepare feasts in their homes and put on a spectacular display of fireworks for the new year. It’s fun to see it that way but I also get this sense of everyone wanting to rush things because they can’t wait for the past year to finally expire.

This year was tough for everyone. All of us have been tossed, turned, and bruised by the events of the world. I feel for everyone who has been victims of injustice. I pray that life will be kinder and more gracious to you as we move into 2021. Thank you for persevering to survive despite the weight of the world. I greatly admire you.

2021. A fresh new year, a clean slate, an empty canvas, where you’re free to do anything you’d wish and hope for. A happy new year. I’m with you guys in welcoming 2021 with arms wide open.

But you know, for me, going through 2020 was one of the greatest gifts that I have ever received.

I think one of the best gifts aside from a boatload of cash is extra time with a side of courage.

I am thankful for 2020 because if I didn’t go through it, I wouldn’t have time to do all the things that I didn’t know I can even do before. Many things in my life shifted and I saw them from a different perspective. My dormant skills came alive and used in creative ways. Because of 2020, I experienced several amazing things the first time. 

With the gift of time and a side of courage, you get to experience many firsts.
Now as I turn a year older, I invite you to look back at 2020 with me and remember all the “firsts” that made this year a memorable one.

1) Spiritual direction at the Cenacle

At the gate of the Cenacle house

Coming from a retreat in 2019, I wanted to start 2020 right by meeting with a spiritual director. I met with Sr. Ana from the Congregation of Our Lady of the Retreat in the Cenacle and we talked for a while about discerning my life direction (I’ll share more about this on a different post). What’s amazing is whatever we talked about that time was tested and proven during my time in quarantine. If not for the extra time I had I wouldn’t be able to see where my talents and skills intersect and where they would lead me.

2) Experience ashfall from a volcano eruption

January this year, Taal Volcano erupted in the Philippines spewing toxic ash into the air that continued to linger for many weeks. We had to wear face masks and protective eyewear to avoid inhaling ash. It’s a precursor to the pandemic here in the Philippines. I never imagined that I’d be able to experience this in my lifetime since Taal has been dormant for a long time.

3) 5km Run at Manila Bay & Intramuros

Originally, I planned to join at least one running event per month this year. I wanted to rake in medals! I only got to February, but the way things turned out was better. I started my year with fitness and now I’m still on the same goal. I miss running with my friends.

4) Start growing a blog

I started my blog last February thanks to a strict nudge from a blogger friend of mine. To be honest, I didn’t even know if my content will ever be read by people. I just wrote down my thoughts and honest feelings. Primarily, I want my blog to be a space of connection (My first post: Creating Spaces for Connection) whatever content it may have.

Today, I’m still surprised to reach more than 200 follows and post my 50th blog entry. I’m so thankful of everyone who’s reading this blog. It’s also amazing how I’m able to connect with fellow bloggers. More to come next year!

5) Facebook and Instagram accounts for Kalvin Five

With the drive to reach more people, I created a Facebook Page and Instagram account for Kalvin Five. I’m happy that I still get to reach people who might find what I write relevant or helpful to them.

Facebook: Kalvin Five
Instagram: @kalvinfive.blog

6) Be a contributing writer for a religious community

I’m blessed to be able to be a contributing writer for a religious community on Facebook. Through writing for the community, I’m able to deepen my Catholic faith and at the same time learn something new about it. Unmasked.

7) Poem collaboration with a friend

Liwanag – Light

I wrote a poem in Filipino in collaboration with a dear blogger friend of mine. It was both our first time and it was magical how every piece just fit together and we finished the poem in a few hours. We published it as a spoken poetry video as well on our pages. I’ve been wanting to do something like this for years and it finally comes true in this amazing piece!

Watch the whole poem here: Liwanag

8) Host a wedding reception in Singapore

A few days before our country went on lockdown, I was in Singapore for a wedding. It was my first time staying in a capsule hotel and going around Singapore alone too. Due to the lockdown measures, the original host needed to fly back earlier than expected so I filled in his spot. With little the remaining time I have, I prepared for the hosting gig and everything went great! Who knew that my first ever hosting gig will be in a foreign country?

9) Host live online prayer meetings

Ministry has to adapt to still reach out to people. As we moved our actual gatherings online, I was blessed to serve as a host in some of our live streams. It takes a little getting used to but it’s all fun once you get the hang of it!

10) Participate in an online choir

That’s me in green

It’s a challenging feat but the end result is just amazing! I was able to stitch together a full-voiced choir using software too!

Check out this performance here: Diwa Ng Pasko

11) Read three self-help books in a month

April was hardest month for me this year and reading helped me out a lot. I don’t usually read self-help books that much but these three helped me stay sane and just keep myself moving forward. These books helped me become more grounded and not spiral out of control. Especially, they made helped me figure out the inner workings of myself more.

Resisting Happiness – Matthew Kelly
How To Befriend Your Shadow “Welcoming Your Unloved Side? – John Monbourquette
How To Discover Your Personal Mission “The Search for Meaning – John Monbourquette

12) Do my own laundry on Facebook Live

Me doing laundry while singing on Facebook Live

Since lockdown happened I learned how to do my own laundry. We don’t have a washing machine at home so I hand-washed everything! There was even a time that I broadcasted my laundry session live on Facebook which people found interesting to watch.

13) Purchase my own bed frame and mattress

I’ve always wanted to remodel my room bit by bit. It was such an adulting move to finally purchase my own bed and mattress! I also decluttered my room of trash and unneeded stuff. My nights have never been so full of comfort and rest. Next up for my room is to paint it blue and get a new desk and a chair.

14) Find out I have high alcohol tolerance

I was out with a few friends of mine a few blocks from where I live. I wasn’t counting how much I’ve already taken in but after sharing a bottle each of wine, tequila, and brandy I’m still up and sober. I was amazed that I did not feel the classic symptoms of being intoxicated as it was my first time to drink that much. Fellas I don’t recommend drinking until you drop. Always keep it safe and keep to your limit.

15) Bake bread and desserts

Baking has become one of my stress busters this year. Buying an oven has been one of the best decisions I’ve ever made this year. My dad has learned how to bake as well and now we don’t buy bread from the supermarket but bake them whenever we need some. I’ve learned so many things in baking and the science-y stuff always amazes me seeing your creation transform behind the glass oven door.

16) Make roast chicken and lechon belly

Having an oven also made me try out recipes that require roasting. I’m proud to have made my first ever roast chicken and lechon belly (Filipino porchetta) and they tasted amazing! I’m getting more confident in my cooking skills. I basted the lechon belly above with a little too much soy sauce on the skin hence the dark color though it’s borderline on getting burnt! haha!

17) Commit to my fitness journey

I’ve already told you guys about my fitness journey this year. I started at 121 kg last January and today I weigh in at 94 kg. It’s been a long journey and I’m still reaching for my goal weight. I started out by changing my diet and doing home exercises. My weight loss stalled and that’s when I enrolled in a gym last October and my Fitness Friday posts were born. I find it hard to keep my diet on track this Christmas season. I need to burn a lot of fat again for a better and fitter me in 2021.

18) Get a proper massage in a massage parlor

On my first full week at the gym I was really sore all around my body which is totally normal if it’s you’re getting back to lifting after a long time or if it’s your first time. I’m really shy about my body so I don’t go to massage parlors but this time I didn’t care about what the therapist might think. I just wanted the aches to go away. Under the hands of a therapist with 20 years of experience under his belt, he soothed my pains away and sent me home relaxed. Go get the massage that your body deserves!

19) Squat with 90 kilos 

I can now lift an average built human!

Coach Joel is just an amazing encourager! I never imagined myself being able to do the things I can do at the gym now if he didn’t push me to do it. I mean wow! 90 kilos! What’s next? 200 kilos? Everything is possible if you remove your own limits 🙂 Thank you to everyone at Fitness and Health Gym you guys rock!

20) Get a facial treatment

This is prickly business! I just did this one last Monday. All this mask wearing and sweating made me breakout with acne around the area. I wanted to have my acne treated before it gets worse. For the first time, I had an online consultation with a dermatologist and she prescribed me with facial treatments and medicine. The dermatologist recommended getting a Glycolic Micropeel treatment to hasten the healing of my acne.

By the gods! The technician pricked my pimples and I shed a few tears! Three days since the treatment, I feel it working! Now I just need to follow through with the skin care regimen.


In a few hours 2020 will be officially over. Today, as I look back I will remember it as a year filled with challenges that helped me come closer to the version of myself that I want to become. I’m another year older now and I feel like there’s more out there for me to experience and enjoy. This year was surely not a joy ride but it’s roughness smoothed out my rough edges. Thank you so much 2020!

I want to end with three birthday wishes.

For myself:
I wish for 2021 to be a year where I reinvent myself to fully become who I envision myself to be – a person who truly loved and fully lived.

For the person who reads this:
I wish that you get to finally do the things you’ve been wanting to do your whole life and share it with the world.

For the world:
I wish that the world will have more safe spaces for connection where people can be loved and accepted without fear.

Oh! And I really really wish that we can already go out of our homes feeling safe without the threat of the pandemic. May our world leaders be guided. Hope to meet you guys outside!

I love you guys!
May you have a happy and meaningful new year!

-Kalvin Cinco


Fitness Friday 07: Have Yourself A Merry Healthy Christmas

Ho Ho Ho! Happy Healthmas!

Christmas is just around the corner. One of the greatest gifts I have given myself this year is the gift of a healthier me. I can’t believe how far I’ve come since I started last April. From 121 kilos, I’ve worked hard to shed extra weight and now I’m 94 kilos. Now that’s a good cause for celebration! Better watch out for my Christmas diet lest I go back to having a body like Santa.

This week, I had a hard time scheduling my day job and work outs but everything fit together perfectly. I moved my Monday workout to Tuesday and then resumed Thursday, then Friday. Next week, we’re going back to regular programming (Merry Christmas!).

Tuesday

Me and my Sweat Angel (Shadow?)

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Cardio (3 sets of):
30 Sprint
20 Plyo Box
30 Single Battle Rope
30 Double Battle Rope
15 Slam Ball

Workout Target Areas: Chest & Triceps

Incline Barbell Press w/ all the sweat

Chest:
12 Incline Barbell Press (3 sets)
12 Lying Bench Press (3 sets)
12 Decline Dumbbell Bench Press (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Pullover (3 sets)

Triceps:
12 Triceps Pressdown (3 sets)
12 Cable Overhead Triceps Extension (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Tricep Extension (3 sets)

*All repetitions increment in weight per set

Core (3 sets of) :
30 Ab Crunches
30 Advanced Leg Raises

Finisher: 3 – min Plank

Cooldown: Walk Home

Sweat Shadow

Notes:

  • I forgot to bring my Garmin watch on this day so I wasn’t able to measure my workout.
  • I learned about Time Under Tension today. It’s the time where your muscles are under tension when doing repetitions. If you rest for too long in between you set your muscles will reset to the way it was.
  • Time Under Tension is important in building muscle. When our muscles are under tension the fibers break down which is one of the goals of body building because it causes new fibers to form during healing.
  • Knowing about this made me realize how important it is to continuously do the reps per set to have better gains.
  • I took the core workout home so I can catch up with my morning meeting.
  • At home, instead of doing the plank 3 minute straight, I did it in 1 minute intervals with 30 seconds rest in between.

Thursday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Cardio (3 sets of):
30 Battle Jacks
10 Duck Walk
15 Hip Bends

Workout Target Areas: Back & Biceps

Back:
12 Deadlifts (3 sets) * I only did 6 reps on the last set
12 Barbell Row (3 sets)
12 Seated Row (3 sets)
12 Wide-Grip Lat Pull-Down (3 sets)
12 Behind-the-Neck Lat Pull-Down (3 sets)
12 T Bar Row (3 sets)

Biceps:
12 Cable Curl (3 sets)
12 Hammer Curl (3 sets)

*All repetitions increment in weight per set

Core:
2 min Plank

Notes:

  • I have never in my entire life did a duck walk until this day. I’m listing it down along with burpees as one of my most disliked cardio workouts ever!
  • I asked my coach how to do a stretching for my back. We did a back extension stretch where you push your upper body from the floor and holding the position. It relieved my muscles that’s threatening to spasm.
  • I learned a new routine on the T Bar Row. It was challenging because your core also gets engaged along with your back. It’s a good workout to do to hit those areas.
  • We only did two biceps routine since we did a lot of cardio in the beginning.
  • The 2 minute plank at the end was CRAZY! I’ve completed a 2 minute plank before but this time I was so tired that I kept breaking the plank. It was funny when coach was encouraging me to finish. A great way to end the workout.

Friday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Legs & Shoulders

Legs:
12 Dead Squats (3 sets)
12 Leg Press (3 sets)
12 Romanian Deadlift (3 sets)
12 Leg Extension (3 sets)
12 Calf Raises (3 sets)

Shoulders:
12 Shoulder Bar Raise (3 sets)
12 Lateral Raise (3 sets)
12 Shoulder Plate Raise (3 sets)
12 Face Pull (3 sets)
12 Upright Row (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Shrugs (3 sets)

*All repetitions increment in weight per set

Core:
100 Leg Raises

Notes:

  • I’m not used to having workouts on two consecutive days so my energy is a bit low. Still, I think today went great.
  • My squat form is improving. I just need to go lower and not be afraid of going down. I guess I’m still wary since I almost had a mishap last week doing squats.
  • I’m surprised that I’m now really trying to push myself to finish a set continuously since coach told me about Time Under Tension.
  • I’m proud that I’m gaining more strength than ever. Good job self!
I can now jump more consistently

If you really want it, work hard for it. There were moments this week where I didn’t want to go the gym but I didn’t want to cheat on myself. I needed to show up for myself because I feel like I owe myself a healthy body for a change. Push!

And now the challenge of a healthy Christmas begins haha! Let’s see how next week goes.


Fitness Friday 04: To A Healthier And Stronger Me For Christmas

The gym is all decked up with Christmas decor!

Coach mixed the routine up this week again so my body won’t quickly adapt to the same workouts. It was fun learning new things though it takes a little getting used to. Still, I kept my head in the game and just stuck with it. Discipline and determination are the keys to good gains.

Monday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Chest & Biceps

Chest:
12 Lying Bench Press (4 sets)
12 Incline Dumbbell Press (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Pullover (3 sets)
12 Pec Deck Machine (3 sets) *no more steppers

Biceps:
12 Seated Preacher Curl (3 sets)
12 Hammer Curl (3 sets)
12 Seated Biceps Curl (3 sets)
12 <Forgot The Name> (3 sets )

*All repetitions increment in weight per set

Core / Cardio (3 sets of):
15 Running Lunges
20 Battle Rope Jacks
30 Crunches
30 Leg Raises

Doing Battle Rope Jacks. The ropes were heavy!

Notes:

  • I found it interesting that my coach put the cardio exercises at the end. As I finished the sets that day I knew why. The new combination of Chest and Biceps was challenging to do.
  • Coach commented that he was surprised at the development of my strength when I did the Seated Preacher Curl. It was a new addition to my routine but I executed it fairly well.
  • I felt so satisfied when I can finally complete the sets of the same that I couldn’t do before without a spotter. My strength is catching up!
  • The Battle Rope Jacks at the end was deceptively easy to look at but it makes you pant like there’s no tomorrow when you do it.

Wednesday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Back & Triceps

Back:
12 Deadlifts (3 sets)
12 Barbell Row (3 sets)
12 Seated Row (3 sets)
12 Behind-The-Neck Lat Pull-Down (3 sets)
12 Reverse Close-Grip Lat Pull-Down (3 sets)
12 Standing Cable Rope Lat Push-Down (3 sets) 

Triceps:
12 Dumbbell Row (3 sets per side)
12 Seated Tricep Extension (3 sets)
12 Triangle Press Down (3 sets)
12 Cable Overhead Triceps Extension (3 sets)
20 Triceps Dips (5 sets)

*All repetitions increment in weight per set

Core (3 sets of):
15 Decline Crunches (w/ 5kg plate)
15 Russian Twist (w/ 5kg plate)

Notes:

  • This was a great day. I felt confident doing the deadlifts and all the other routines. The belt helps brace my waist and back for proper form.
  • I’m gaining strength in my triceps as well. I’m amazed at the progress that’s happening. I’m so proud of myself.
  • I remember not being able to do 5 continuous Triceps Dips but now I can finish 20 in one go! 
  • The Decline Crunches and Russian Twist is a new routine for me. THEY HURT SO BAD! I’m exaggerating but I told Aldren that I felt like I was dying haha! I completed the sets anyway all for the sake of progress!
  • Coach Joel told me that it’s important to master the correct form first before adding more weight. If we don’t do the correct form it will do more damage than good gains.

Thursday

Notes:

  • Ugh! Fasted cardio homework is really challenging! 
  • My balance is really being tested with the running lunges followed by the burpees.
  • Capping the workout with 100 Leg Raises followed by a 2 min. Plank gives me a great sense of accomplishment in the morning. 
  • Oh! everything just hurts so well!

Friday

Warm-up: 20 min. Stationary Bike

Pre Cardio (2 sets of):
15 Squats
15 Running Lunges

Cardio: Tabata with Coach Thea

Tabata workout series

Workout Target Areas: Shoulder & Legs

Shoulders:
12 Seated Shoulder Press(3 sets)
12 Lateral Dumbbell Raises (3 sets)
12 Reverse Pec Deck (3 sets)
12 Shoulder Plate Raises (3 sets)
15 Plate Shrugs (3 sets)

Legs:
12 Dead Squats (3 sets) *compounded
12 Leg Press (3 sets) *compounded

*All repetitions increment in weight per set

Core:
100 Crunches
100 Leg Raises

Notes:

  • To be honest I was feeling really lazy to go to the gym today. I think it’s because I moved our schedule from morning to the afternoon to make way for a meeting.
  • Coach Joel wasn’t there yet when I arrived but he gave me instructions to do 20 min. on the bike. 
  • Coach Thea took me in for cardio and I did Tabata with fellow gym-goers. It was a first for me though it was really fun! We executed a series of floor exercises with music. I was drenched in sweat when we finished and left a little puddle on the area I worked out on.
  • After Tabata, I lifted weights with Coach.
  • Working out the shoulders is challenging for me since I seldom use those muscles extensively on a daily basis. I am proud that they’re now getting stronger. What I couldn’t lift before, I can now lift with better ease and a few grunts.
  • We took it easy on the legs today since we’re going out on a hiking trip this Sunday. It’s my first time joining them on an outing. I’m excited!

To end, I want to show you guys a lonesome yet festive “Christmas Tree” I found on my walk home. Going to the gym and becoming a healthier version of myself is one of the best Christmas gifts I’ve ever given myself. I’ve never felt this good about my body for years! Here’s to a bright Christmas season for all of us!


Fitness Friday 03: I Did A 90-Kilo Squat!

I never saw myself lifting that amount of weight. 90 kilos is more than a huge sack of rice! I’m so proud of myself for not giving up.

This week I noticed my gains in strength. It’s amazing to feel and see the progress that’s happening in my body. My weight lifting belt also came in which provided extra support for me when lifting. This was an amazing week!

Monday

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Cardio (3 sets of):
30 Jumping jacks side to side 
30 Single Battle Rope 
30 Double Battle Rope 
15 Slam Ball

Workout Target Areas: Compounded Areas

12 Dead Squats (3 sets)
12 Incline Dumbbell Bench Press (3 sets)
12 Bench Press (3 sets)
12 Deadlifts (3 sets) *no more steppers
12 Military Press (3 sets)
12 Seated Row (3 sets)
12 Kneeling Cable Crunches (3 sets)

*All repetitions increment in weight per set

Core:
100 Leg Raises

Drenched in sweat

Notes:

  • Today, coach Joel mixed things up a bit. We mostly did compound training hitting several muscles per workout routine.
  • I lifted heavier weight on my squats and deadlifts which surprised me because I could perform the movements well already with only minor adjustments needed.
  • Coach told me that we’ll change up training for this month to see how my body will respond to it. I’m gaining strength and I’m all for it!
  • It was an interesting and exciting day especially that it marks my actual 1 month in the gym. I’m definitely seeing progress.

Tuesday

Notes:

  • Did my fasted cardio. I found doing the running lunges hard end only ended up doing 20 repetitions per set.
  • I pushed myself to finish the 100 leg ups and the 2-minute plank.

Wednesday

I forgot to record some of the workouts so I missed some data

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Workout Target Areas: Chest and Triceps

Chest:
12 Incline Dumbbell Bench Press (4 sets)
12 Flat Bench Press (4 sets)
12 Dumbbell Pullover (4 sets)
12 Pec Deck Machine (4 sets)
12 Cable Crossover (4 sets)

Triceps:
12 Triceps Pull Over (4 sets)
15 Triceps Pull Down (4 sets)
15 Rope Push Down (4 sets)
15 Triceps Kick Back (4 sets)
Hanging Leg Raise

*All repetitions increment in weight per set

Core:

100 Seated Crunches
100 Seated Flutter Kicks (did at home)
50 Leg Ups (did at home)

Notes:

  • It was amazing to see my strength development today. I’m starting off on heavier weights now and progressing to the second rack of heavier equipment. 
  • From 3 sets coach added another set to push my development because he sees that I have the capacity to do more and I believe it too! COOL!
  • Coach told me that the more muscle I put on, the faster my metabolism will be. The same goes for when you put on fat, your metabolism will get slower.
  • Aldren helped me with my sets again!
  • Everyone in the gym was so supportive I like the environment so much!
  • I tried to do the hanging leg raises but I just can’t muster the strength for it yet. But soon I know I can do it!
  • I took the remaining core exercises for today home because I have a meeting

Friday (90 Kilos!)

Warm-up: 10 min. Stationary Bike

Cardio (3 sets of):
1 min. High Knees
10 Burpees
30 Battle Rope
15 Plyobox

Workout Target Areas: Legs and Shoulders

Legs:
12 Dead Squats (3 sets)
12 Seated Leg Press (3 sets)
12 Lying Leg/Hamstring Curl (3 sets)
12 Seated Leg Extension (3 sets)
12 Standing Calf Raises (3 sets)
15 Weighted Lunges (3 sets)

Shoulders:
12 Dumbbell Shoulder Press (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Lateral Raises (3 sets)
12 Front Plate Raise (3 sets)
12 Standing Reverse Pec Deck (3 sets)
12 Rope Face Pull (3 sets)
12 Dumbbell Shrug (3 sets)

*All reps increment in weight per set

Core:
50 Crunches
50 Leg Raises
50 Superman Planks

Lifting 90 kilos! Personal Record!

Notes:

  • I did the cardio with Bison a fellow gym-goer. It was challenging for me to do cardio with him because I had the inclination to match his pace. It was fun to do it together though!
  • I’m lifting heavier weights now. I lifted 90 kilos doing squats! My new personal record.
  • I’m surprised at the amount of strength I’ve gained. I feel so happy!
  • It’s Aldren’s birthday today too! Happy Birthday, Bro!
  • A neighbor I barely talk to told me that I lost a lot of weight as we were walking past each other. This put a huge smile behind my face mask. 

I feel so accomplished this week, especially today now that I’m seeing what gains I’ve worked hard for. Here’s to a healthier and stronger me as the year ends.


Sinagot Ng Pagmamahal – Answered By Love

Sinagot Ng Pagmamahal

(Filipino)

Hindi ko alam ang sagot
Sa lahat ng mga tanong mo sa buhay
Pero itanong mo lang
Makikinig ako sa bawat salita
Makikiramay sa bawat luha
Nandito ako

Pangako, palagi kang may tahanan sa akin
Hahawakan ko ang mga kamay mo
At sasamahang hanapin ang mga sagot
Sa bawat sulok at bawat dulo
Magka sugat-sugat man tayo

Kung pagod ka na
Ang alok ko’y kapahingahan
Lalaban ng magkasama
Hanggang malaman natin na
Wala pala ang sagot sa mundo
Kundi nakatanim ng malalim sa puso
Hindi na kailangan pang lumayo

Buksan ang iyong dibdib
Na napalambot ng paglalakbay
Ilabas lahat ng tanong
Sa tahanan ng iyong puso
Pakinggan mo at unti-unting huminahon
Tahan na, tahan na
Naririnig ka
Sinagot ka ng Pagmamahal

Answered By Love

(English)

I don’t know the answers
To all the questions you have in life
But ask them anyway
I will listen to every word
I will remain through every tear
I’m here

Promise, you will always have a home in me
I will hold your hands
And be by your side to find the answers
Through every corner and every dead end
Even if we get wounded in the process

When you get tired
I offer myself as a resting place
We will fight our battles together
Until we realize that
The answer is not in the world
But planted deep within our hearts
We didn’t need to go far

Open up your chest
Softened by the journey
Let all your questions out
In the home of your heart
Listen and slowly calm down
It’s okay, It’s okay
You’re being heard
You were answered by Love


I originally wrote this tula (poem) in Filipino. I tried my best translating the words and feelings in English. I hope the message comes across the same. For the ones who have been searching for so long. For the ones who feels heavily burdened by with life. I hope that you find a home to come back to. Whether that home is a person or a place, I sincerely pray, especially as the year ends, that you come to a home where you are welcomed, appreciated, and loved. May each of us find our way home.

Until next time!

Photo by Jordan Wozniak on Unsplash